• Transcript


    Book 1, Chapter Four: The Olympic Games, Pages 79 and 80

    On arrival at Pisa, where the year’s Olympics are set,
    when the horses and the chariot are at last brought to prep,
    to be smoothed, washed and decked with all the finery befitting a worthy competition,
    Alexander and Hephaestion venture off
    for a getaway in the city.

    Arm-in-arm they savour
    fresh pomegranate,
    and buskers free
    and shops aplenty,
    full of trinkets galore.

    However a sight unusual catches
    the attention of Hephaestion.
    Excitedly, he taps Alexander’s shoulder.
    “Ooh Alexander. Look!
    Check him out!”

    Now, my friends, what is this sight
    other than a strapping fellow,
    purple-coated and
    black-haired braided sparkling
    with ribbons of gold,
    hoisted in a litter,
    proud and arrogant in the halo of his
    good looks and untold wealth.
    You know the type.

    Alexander shivers,
    “Aiee! If that isn’t the tackiest garden ornament I’ve ever seen!”

    Hephaestion tries not to laugh at his friend’s remark,
    and just as well,
    for the garden ornament is now on his way to greet them,
    noble to noble.

    Chapter Four 079-080

    [pokemon encounter music plays] A new rival approaches!

     

    Footnotes:

    Ancient Greek little horse toy on wheels

    The palanquin is somewhat anachronistic but the Olympics Games story is not “accurate” anyway, and I can’t imagine this punk being introduced any other way.

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